If I could talk to my mother who passed away in 2010 this is what I would say. “Mom, I think about you every day and miss our conversations. I wonder if you are in heaven and if so what it’s like …
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If I could talk to my mother who passed away in 2010 this is what I would say.
“Mom, I think about you every day and miss our conversations. I wonder if you are in heaven and if so what it’s like up there? Is Dad up there, too? If Dad wants a drink or an AA meeting what do they do about that in heaven? Or what if Dad wants to go fishing? And you, do they have any horses for you to ride or cats to pet? I picture you and Aunt Pat riding your horses together up there down a trail.
Down here on earth it’s getting near Thanksgiving. I’ll bet you’re relieved you don’t have to host Thanksgiving dinner any more. I liked hosting it when I had children at home, but not so much as I’ve grown older. Too much work! I still have your turkey diary which describes what kind of turkey you chose, how much it weighed, how long you cooked it and how it turned out. You always put on a great dinner with a white tablecloth, silverware, potatoes and gravy, etc.
I am thankful for a good thing has happened. Daughter Lily and son-in-law Wagner always want the Thanksgiving at their house in Longmont. All Dick and I have to do is bring something. This year Lily requested me to bring my pumpkin pies like the scrumptious ones I made in memory of Jim on his birthday Oct. 23. To celebrate Jim’s first birthday since he died, Lily and the grandkids came down to our house. After dinner at La Fonda Mexican restaurant we all came back to our house for dessert. The pies happened to be the best ever with non-gluten crusts and almond milk instead of canned milk. And add cool whip and we celebrated Jim, your grandson. He’s up there in heaven way too early at 33. But maybe you are all there together? I hope so.
Jim would he be happy if there’s freight trains to hop in heaven. You know he died doing what he loved to do, showing people from all over the world America by freight train. His videos on YouTube under the name Hobestobe are outliving him with new YouTube watchers requesting to be on his Facebook site “Remembering Stobe the Hobo” every day. It’s been a year now since he died but the fans have not faded out. His following has grown and many are expressing grief, and even tears, that he is gone.
I asked son Jim to stop hopping trains because it was so dangerous. He was getting older and I feared he might make a mistake while so tired from lack of sleep. I do believe that is partly what happened. As an Amtrak train caught his backpack on a railroad bridge in Baltimore early in the morning. He texted me the night before he died, and he sounded cold, wet and tired. I wish I could have wrapped a blanket around him, held him and told him I loved him.
As Thanksgiving approaches I miss him terribly, but I am thankful I had him as long as I did. Actually I miss him all the time, but in some ways it is like he is still with me. He particularly liked Turkey legs, he would have requested that at Thanksgiving along with a six-pack of beer.
Well Mom, that is enough for now. Have a Happy Thanksgiving in heaven, I love you!”
Mary Stobie is a syndicated columnist and a grandmother. You can reach her at firstname.lastname@example.org.
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